Saturday, October 15, 2011



In trying to post something on psychology and in light of the recent posts on the Arab-Israeli conflict, I thought a re-posting on this thinking error was apropos!

Power and control is most often used by very entitled people:  narcissists, anti-socials, borderlines.  

Why do people feel entitled?  Usually because of deprivation, abuse, cultural beliefs.  P and C thoughts often begin with, "I deserve this because..." or "They deserve this because...".  P and C is also a way of convincing yourself that you do not need to take accountability for your actions.

But this thinking error is common to most people who have used it at one time or another.  It is also common to people who have had other people power-thrust against them, resulting in feelings of anger, fear, revenge, pain, sorrow, frustration to name some of them.

Is wanting power and control in our lives a bad ambition?  No, not necessarily.  It can be very good when we use it ethically and for the good of ourselves and others.  It becomes negative when used against others, to hurt others, to manipulate others...

Politics is a super common arena for this thinking error!

POWER AND CONTROL:  You expect to control others.  Since you are special you think others should obey you.  You use power thrusts (getting over physically or psychologically on another person) to get out of "zero state"--another TE.  Getting over on others, lying, manipulating are all good ways to control others; they do not have the right to make any demands on you.

            Example:          You tell a country that it had better give you what you want, because if it doesn’t, you threaten it with violence and coercion.

            Payoff:              You get people to do what you want.  You feel superior to others.  You do not have to do what others ask of you.

            Consequence:   You do not know how to have a relationship with other countries (due in part to your selfishness).  People avoid you.  You do not know how to meet your own needs because you are used to other people meeting them for you.  People only respond to you out of fear and do not trust you.

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